“Life has no remote control, you have to get up to change it. Reach inwards and find your resilience.”
Hear this truth, anything you don’t change in your life remains unchanged. God will not do for a man what a man must do for himself. You have been given a head (and most probably with a brain in it) so you don’t give God headaches. He is almighty and yes He is responsible and so should you as His child. The road will be tough but resilience will get you home.
Six years ago, I left the comfort and safety of family and homeland in Nigeria to pursue my dreams as a migrant (legal) in the United Kingdom. Yes Great Britain as I knew it! I had faith in my maker and trusted that I was up for whatever life throws at me in England.
Make no mistake I had paid my dues, I had a shed load of real experiences back in Nigeria.
The good the bad and the ugly. I had a great upbringing. I knew what it meant to have and what it meant to have not. I rode high and stayed low. I had good times and bad times. I lived and was loved. I broke hearts and had mine broken. I had successfull businesses and I failed at some. All these made me who I was. I was ready for the United Kingdom. At least so I thought.
After three months in the UK, I began to question my convictions. Things weren’t going as I had planned or at least I had thought. I soon ran out of money and reality began to hit home. I got my first job in England (you can ask me what job, if you really want to know) and on my first day, I knew it wasn’t for me. I was tough enough, Lasgidi boy (Lagos boy) should be. But no, the job just wasn’t for me and to be honest I couldn’t survive another day at it.
Fast forward >> >> >>
I soon got another job. This was something I could live with and it made the thought of becoming homeless varnish albeit temporarily. Yes I was almost homeless in the UK but for the grace of God. The house agent allowed me 3 months to bring my rent up to date and yes I did. God bless him.
Things went from bad to worse.
I struggled to meet up with paying my bills (oh and that was by no means cheap), paying for uni and actually attending uni enough to make the grades. I am trying hard to hold back my tears as I write at this point but am just going to let it flow because they are now tears of joy. I will spare you the details of the darkness I went through. Just know that my emotional, mental, psychological, physical and spiritual resilience was tried to their limits. They say that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. You guessed right, I didn’t crack. I came through it and I became better and stronger than the pre-crisis me. Yes I became unstoppable.
Resilience. I finally discovered this superpower has always been in me. Somewhere on the inside. It took adversity to bring it out. You truly don’t know how strong you are until being strong is your only option.
I read this in a post of a man saying…
“I mowed the lawn today, and after doing so I sat down and had a cold beer. The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking.
My wife walked by and asked me what I was doing and I said ‘nothing’. The reason I said that instead of saying ‘just thinking’ is because she would have said ‘about what’. At that point I would have to explain that men are deep thinkers about various topics which would lead to other questions.
Finally I thought about an age old question: Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts? Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts.
Well, after another beer, and some heavy deductive thinking, I have come up with the answer to that question. Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby; and here is the reason for my conclusion. A year or
so after giving birth, a woman will often say, “It might be nice to have another child.” On the other hand, you never hear a guy say, “You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts.” I rest my case.”
Well, as a man, I was tempted to share the logically deep thinking old man’s sentiments but then I had a sudden deep awakening.
Why would any man want another kick in the nuts? Getting kicked in the nuts has no rewards whatsoever unless the man is screwed up in the head in some ways. On the other hand, a woman would like another baby despite the agonies and travails of child birth because she gets something very rewarding out of it. The joys of having a child makes the whole pain worthwhile.
This is the same with life my dear friend. Are you are going through hell today, don’t stop.
As long as there is a worthwhile reward for you at the end of the journey, keep going. Once you have taken that first step, you have been commited. Don’t quit, you are closer to your reward than when you first started. Never give up. Find your resilience and it will get you home. Keep your eyes on the target and keep on keeping on.
My name is Mr Kennedy and I am the Founder & CEO of Nexus Exchange Limited. Life gave me lemon and I made champagne out of it.
I am not where I want to be yet but am certainly not where I used to be. I didn’t get here on my own. I had God on my side. I had resilience. I had a lot of practical help along the way. Nobody gave me money. Some wonderful people gave me things money couldn’t buy; advice, counsel, encouragement, company and love.
What is your super power. How strong is your kung-fu?
You are reading this piece because I didn’t give in. I found resilience. It became my super power. It is my kung-fu and it is very strong.
I am living my dream today. You too can. I need wonderful individuals like you, yes you reading this to get to where I am going. I have grown and learnt do much from helping people strengthen their kung-fu and in doing so I found a new selfishness. The joy that comes from adding value to someone’s life is priceless. That is all mine to relish. It is my new selfishness. The more I experience it, the more I want to experience. You are here today because you chose to. You can change your life today if you choose to. Just get up and change it. Yes you can!
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